I'm Trabajando, Damn It!

Yes, those words were heard in the office recently.  You see, we are all crammed in cubicles the size of postage stamps.  We hear each other's conversations, get to see each other acting goofy, have half our daily conversations over cubicle walls, and sometimes get overwhelmed by both by the closeness of others.

By far, the funniest is overhearing each other's conversations.  It's not that we try to eavesdrop.  Honest!  You just can't help but hear.  Add in the fact that I could have exceptionally good hearing (as does my work BFF) and you get to hear some doozies.

In the past few months we've encountered:

• Some of the Sales guys SCREAM over March Madness.  *Little tip, boys... the conference rooms aren't sound-proofed!*
• A new employee declare how dumb we all are and criticize the looks of a few people.  *He's gone now...but we've also had a few run-ins where he stood in his office on his desk and grabbed his man-parts.*
• The ability to watch multiple office romances.  Now, I've been with my company for almost seven years now.  In that time, there have been at least a half dozen office weddings and LOVE is in the air lately.  Just, um, not for me.  But I'm cool with the people watching, trust me.
• Oh, and I had to yell at someone because they were doing their make-up while the fire alarm was going off.  SERIOUSLY, I had to tell her three times that This is NOT a drill and I WILL tell her manager if she declines to follow our safety protocol.  I'm nice...but I'm not waiting in a burning building so you can do your MAKE-UP. 

Really, the most fun we have is when mass emails come out making odd pronouncements.  "We will have client X in the office tomorrow.  Ladies, please be sure to wear trousers and hose!"  Um...OK.  I'm under 60. Do I REALLY have to wear "hose"?!?!  I promise that the shock of my my sandal-clad feet won't send anyone to the hospital!  And who's the lucky person standing at the elevator letting our techies know that their "Geek is the new black" and "Speak Geeky to me" t-shirts aren't formal enough?  Or that socks and tevas is a bit less than business casual?

Do I work at the only company that seems to have it's own soap opera?  And if you office is like mine - can you pick out the heroes/heroines and villains/evil biatches?